Posts Tagged ‘Hollyweird’
Gary Oldman Denies Being Arrested as Dirty Old Man
Police in Spring Hill, Tennessee apparently arrested Gary Oldman for having sex with a homemade sex doll outside Allendale Elementary School. Attempts to reach Gary Oldman were initially unsuccessful, due to his lack of an official publicist. His agent, Douglas Urbanski, [Read More]
World Peace Arrives in Finland, Agent Apologizes
The Hot Lokoko of the Finnish Basketball Association have announced that Ron Artest… we mean “World Peace” will arrive in Finland this September, but the reaction has been muted. Kari Bärlund of the True Finns Party gave a terse response when asked what [Read More]
Celebrities Grossly Underestimate Twitter Addiction
It seems that most of us didn’t notice the digital death of Justin Timberlake, Lady Gaga, Ryan Seacrest, Alicia Keys, and others. Their tweets were silenced in the hopes of raising $1m for charity, Keep a Child Alive. However, not content with their digital death and [Read More]
Tommy Lee Protests Whale Masturbation
In a rant posted to SeaWorld, Tommy Lee, accuses the park of using Tilimuck the killer whale as a sperm bank. Many may remember Tilimuck making waves after being involved in the deaths of three people. Tommy is especially disgusted by the methods used to extract the sperm: [Read More]
The Italian Stallion “Rises” Again
Finally, the announcement that we’ve all been waiting for; the rights to Sylvester Stallone’s long, lost porn classic The Party At Kitty And Stud’s (aka The Italian Stallion) have been purchased, meaning that we may get to see the scene that inspired the [Read More]
